The green eyed monster

I have a huge case of the "I want's". I see what others have, the neat new gadgets, new clothes, new cars, new....stuff, and I admit it, I want what they have.

I get tired of wearing the same outfits all the time. Most depressing to me? When I realized that I have shoes and pants that are older than my youngest child. In my regular clothing rotation, I have pants and shoes that are over 10 years old (let that one sink in...). I suppose it is a good thing that I chose classic styles so I don't look too out of place. And that I obviously haven't gained or lost a lot of weight.

I get tired of being RESPONSIBLE all the time. Of being the one in our marriage to say "no, we really don't need that right now." It makes me feel mean and petty.

I want to splurge. Truely, I do! I want a nice vacation, to go someplace special. I want to buy new things for my son's, simply because.

What I do not want is debt. I do not want a credit card. I do not want a car payment. I do not want to worry each month about how I am going to pay all the bills.

Every individual makes different choices in life. Each choice needs to be balanced out with current needs, future needs, how much use and enjoyment an item will give you.

I love being able to stay at home, even though my boys are older. I love knowing that, at the drop of a hat, I can go somewhere or do something for them, and I won't need to ask for time off. If my child is ill or needs to go to the doctors, I can go at any time.

I enjoy baking cookies for my family. Making homemade jam. I love sitting on my back deck and watching the ducks play, seeing the birds at the feeders. I enjoy the sense of peace that I have in my life because I am not rushing as much as I would be if I were working.

We all make different choices in life. My old pants are looking better now. My small house is cozy. More importantly, it is HOME. Having a savings account is security and safety to me, and if I spent money, I would have much less of it.

Green-eyed monster, please go away. Please go bother someone else, because I am happy with the way things are in my life.

I need to remember what is important to me. Which freedoms and choices would I need to give UP in order to have things. After thinking about it, it just isn't worth it. I'll keep things the way they are, and wait a while longer for my wants to come to me.